Shake, Rattle & Roll

On Tuesday at about 11:47 a.m., I was sitting at my desk when I suddenly became aware that I was moving back and forth. I looked up from the file I was reviewing and noticed my tall plant was gently swaying, as was the heavy door to my office. What followed were rapid moments of recognition, doubt and finally acknowledgment that I was experiencing an earthquake. Almost as soon as that identification was established, the quaking stopped.

I have learned that many Las Vegans did not feel the shocks from the Chino Hills earthquake. However, everyone in my office did. Apparently, even being just five stories high makes quite a difference.

I will never grow accustomed to earthquakes. I have not lived through any violent earthquakes; just mostly the gentle swaying motions. However, there is something so eerie, so unnatural, about seeing cement floors and "solid" walls undulate that it forces me to think about the inevitable and uncomfortable questions regarding stability and what would happen in a real earthquake.

The Boys

In just a few short months, Benjamin has managed to accomplish what it takes most males
several decades to do: he has gone from a spiky flat-top look . . .

to a comb-over.

Our hot Las Vegas weather lends to indoor play in the summer. Lately, the kids have been creating their own costumes. Josh scrounged up this outfit, which was his depiction of a Union soldier from the Civil War. Josh looks serious because soldiers are serious. His rifle is a highly dangerous ping-pong ball gun.

Not to be outdone, Joseph decided to go with the Colonial look, sans powdered wig. I like his use of long shorts as knickers.

My Silly Little Girls

Angelina was preparing some mac & cheese in the microwave and had to see what was happening. Lately, Angelina has to get up on the counter for everything. In the morning, she climbs up on the vanity in my bathroom and talks to me while I shave and get ready for work. If she is in the kitchen, she has to climb up to see what is cooking or to help with preparing meals. I guess it is hard being only three feet tall.

Speaking of three feet tall, Allyse came downstairs wearing a costume that is far too small for her. About a month ago, Allyse realized that she is thin enough to fit into some items that Angelina wears. The only problem is that the length doesn't quite work out. No problem for the Mickey Mouse costume, as she shortened the legs to create this sight.

Angelina stepped in to create a sense of scale for Allyse in the Mickey costume.

Joseph's Art Quest

Recently, there was a contest at the kid's school called "Art Quest" in which students tried to identify works of art by artist name. The works of art being tested were by the following twelve artists: Pierre Auguste Renoir, Marc Chagall, Keith Haring, Michelangelo, Georgia O'Keeffe, Henri Matisse, Henri De Toulouse-Lautrec, Claude Monet, Ansel Adams, Norman Rockwell, Jackson Pollock, and Salvador Dali.

For the time being, a PowerPoint presentation, which was posted to help students practice for the contest, can be accessed by clicking here. Follow the “Current Art Quest Slides” link when you reach the page. You might want to test yourself (it can be quite humbling).

All of the children competed against children in their own grades to be final contestants at a school-wide finale. Joseph was the only of our children to survive to the final round, where, as a first-grader, he competed against twenty-four other children from first through fifth grades.

In the end Joseph placed ninth out of twenty-five. He finished ahead of all the first graders, almost all of the second graders, most of the third-graders, and even ahead of some fourth and fifth-graders.

WAY TO GO, JOE!

Encore

Last night treated us to a repeat performance of the previous, with a twist. As feared, Joseph was again teetering between high ketones, nausea, ketoacidosis, insulin, fever, hypoglycemia and more nausea. For a primer on how it dangerous it can be, see On Razor's Edge.

I was still up at 3:00 a.m., after having tried for the previous half-hour to encourage Joseph to get some food in his stomach so that I could give him some insulin without crashing his blood sugar. All of a sudden, Allyse woke up crying with an upset stomach. We were able to calm Allyse quickly, so I started reading to pass the time while I waited for the next time that I was going to test Joseph to see if he was showing any improvement. Because he had several consistently high ketone tests in a row, I had already determined that I was going to take him to UMC if he tested high again.

In the meantime, it soon became apparent that Allyse would not be able to sleep unless and until she vomited; it was no longer a question of if, but when. It also was fairly obvious that she had food poisoning from eating a hamburger that had not been completely cooked. Allyse had eaten dinner with her Sunday School class at their teacher's home. While I was reading, I came across a story where Kroger (parent corp for Smith's) had expanded a recall of ground beef tainted with E Coli to include Las Vegas Smith's stores for beef dated "sell by" through nearly the end of this month. Smith's is one of only two grocery stores in our neighborhood.

Now that I was completely freaked out, I was convinced that Allyse had to get rid of what was making her sick. I unsuccessfully tried to convince Allyse that sticking her finger down her throat would cause her to gag and get rid of the offending food. That was Plan A; Plan B was to trick her. She had earlier asked for water, and I told her that water wasn't a good idea because it would likely make her stomach more upset. I told her that when I still had hope that Allyse would be able to get back to sleep. However, now that I knew Allyse was truly sick, I asked her if she was thirsty, and when she said she was, I encouraged her to drink some water.

Within minutes, Allyse had lost it, and almost immediately, she said she was feeling much better. She quickly got to sleep and slept quite soundly the rest of the night. I, on the other hand, had to wait a while longer to test Joseph. I was already planning how I would just get ready for work, take Joseph to UMC, get him admitted in the PICU, and later in the morning walk over to the NICU to meet with one of the neonatalogists prior to taking him to court for a hearing that morning. However, when I tested Joseph at 3:30 a.m., I was pleasantly surprised to learn that Joseph's ketones had almost completely returned to normal.

As a result, I was able to get to sleep by 3:45 a.m., only to be awoken by Benjamin at 6:30 a.m. I won't bore with all of the day's details, but I highly recommend to avoid attending court hearings and meetings of the Board of County Commissioners on just two hours and forty-five minutes of sleep.

On Razor's Edge

When I got home from work tonight, my three-year-old, Angelina, met me and informed me that she was sick. Since Joseph is the one who has been sick for the past few days, and since I had not heard anything about Angelina coming down with something, I suspected that she was really okay. I asked Angelina how she knew that she was sick and she said, "My throat is in my neck."

After repeatedly asking Angelina what she meant, I gave up trying to figure it out. I don't know--maybe it's gang code. In any event, she seemed shocked, and actually laughed, when I told her that my throat is in my neck as well.

After the illness that has beset our family for the last few weeks, it was easy to understand why Angelina thought she was sick. In the first week of July, Allyse and Benjamin came down with a prolonged fever. For Allyse, it lasted about five days, and it caused her to have nausea the majority of the time. Benjamin was pretty darn ornery (for him) for about a week. During the next week, it hit Joshua, but to a much lesser extent than Allyse.

We hoped that we had escaped with Joseph, but finally, the fever hit Joseph last Thursday. He experience a brief reprieve on Friday (long enough to go to school and compete in the Art Quest), but then it returned with a vengeance on Friday afternoon, and it hit me on Saturday.

The brakes on my car were in bad shape, so I completely changed out all four rotors and all of the pads on Saturday. However, by the time I was finishing, I was starting to feel pretty bad, and I came down with a fever and body aches. I also had a splitting headache that did not leave until Monday morning.

No matter how sick I felt, it didn't compare to Joseph. Due to Joseph's diabetes, the last 48 hours have been an absolute roller coaster ride. Once again, ketoacidosis is the issue. Julene and I have been doing everything we can to keep from having to return Joseph to the Pediatric Intensive Care Unit at UMC. It is one thing when Joseph's insulin pump is not properly delivering insulin (for whatever malfunction). It is a totally different animal when he experiences nausea due to viral infection.

Here's the problem. With nausea, Joseph cannot keep food and drink down. Without food and drink Joseph's blood sugar will not be high enough to give him insulin. Without insulin, Joseph's ketones rise, and he becomes at risk for ketoacidosis. In addition, if his blood sugar gets too high, he gets ketones. When he has ketones, then he gets even more nauseated. However, once he gets ketones, if we give him too much insulin to reduce the ketones, then we risk sending him into hypoglycemia. In a mild case, hypoglycemia also increases nausea, which then makes it nearly impossible to get food into Joseph to make his blood sugar rise again. In more severe case, hypoglycemia causes coma and death.

It feels as if we are performing a balancing act on a razor's edge. If we teeter even a small distance, then it rapidly sends everything completely out of whack, with potentially disastrous consequences. Then we spend the next several hours trying to regain some sort of equilibrium before he flies off in another direction. Last night I was up until 1:30 a.m. testing Joseph's blood and testing his ketones, giving him insulin, giving him carbohydrates, and praying that it would all come together. Then, Julene was up in the wee hours of the morning and I was back up at 5:15 a.m. for more of the same.

There were numerous times yesterday and today when we were minutes from taking him to the PICU. Julene called Joseph's doctor, explained the situation, and tried to get some more direction. They seemed surprised that we have been able to hold it together this long. However, today Joseph was so tired of being nauseated that he was asking to go to the hospital.

I still am fighting the fever, and the headaches and body aches are intermittent. Mostly, I am exhausted, and I know that Julene is tired too, having to take the brunt of it Monday, in addition to caring for the baby and the rest of the children. We are just praying that Joseph's fever will break on Tuesday, and that he will feel a settling of his digestive system at that time so that things can return to their normal state of chaos.

Morphing Fun

About a month ago, I was adjusting the photos that I had taken on our Lake Tahoe trip. I had just finished cropping photos of Allyse and Joshua, and I was toggling back and forth between them when I noticed that how similar the two of them are. Now, of course I noticed many years ago that they have a certain resemblance, but this was a little eerie.

Just for fun, I downloaded a trial version of some morphing software and created a video of Joshua morphing into Allyse. Unfortunately, as a trial version, it leaves a watermark on the video, but I think the idea is still conveyed.

Kicking Against the Pricks

I typically do not get really preachy in this blog, but there was a story in the Deseret News that struck me as a pathetic personification of the scriptural phrase, “kicking against the pricks.” A year ago, I saw a story about a Las Vegas man, who claimed membership in the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, who put together some beef-cake calendar featuring men who had previously served full-time missions for the Church. The calendar publisher, Chad Hardy, called the calendar Men on a Mission.

Well, it turns out that he is now facing church disciplinary action. The letter from his Stake President was provided to the Associated Press just a few days before Hardy was to release the 2009 version of the calendar. Since disciplinary matters are considered private and the Church does not provide copies of such letters to the press, I am left to assume that Hardy provided the letter, and did so in order to stir up some free publicity for his calendar (which I am also doing by writing about this matter). One has to wonder about how much someone truly values membership in the Church if the individual seeks to use a disciplinary hearing to make more money.

There were some fascinating quotes from the AP article. First, as I had suspected from the inception, the article provides some good insight into where Hardy stands. "Hardy acknowledged he's not been an active member of the church since 2002. A returned missionary who served in southern California, he said he no longer pays church tithing or wears the religious undergarments considered sacred."

Another quote showed either that Hardy is completely ignorant, or disingenuous. I am leaning toward disingenuous due to his willingness to use his disciplinary hearing as a marketing tool – selling his membership for filthy lucre. Hardy claimed that his "right to free speech is being violated." I always laugh when I hear people say this, as I cannot believe that people so badly misunderstand the right to free speech. He is not being imprisoned for his speech. He is free to express himself as he wishes. However, he is not free from the consequences that will naturally flow from such speech. Due to his opinions and his behavior, a private organization may not want its name associated with his. The organization is free to disassociate itself from him.

Hardy stated that the purpose of his calendar was to shake up Mormon stereotypes. (I thought the purpose was to make him some money – silly me). "It's not tearing anybody down," Hardy said. "I wondered what would happen if we took that perfect Disneyland image that the church spends millions of dollars cultivating each year and shook it up a little bit." In other words, he was not tearing anyone down, but he wanted to tear down the carefully cultivated public image of the Church. Hmmmm.

Then, Hardy went on to oddly insinuate that his inactivity is the Church's fault. "In six years, Hardy said he's never been contacted by anyone from the church encouraging his return to the fold and he suspects the current inquiry was driven by the church's Salt Lake City headquarters."

As I stated at the start of this post, this perfectly illustrates the proverbial kicking against the pricks. The phrase comes from farming, and since most people tilled the soil in the not-too-distant past, the analogy was well understood until our generation.

Before mechanization of farming methods, farmers used oxen to work the soil. The prick (or goad) was a useful device to manage oxen.The prick was usually a wooden shaft with a pointed spike (prick) at one end. The farmer working the ox would position the prick so as to exert influence and control over the ox. If the ox refused the farmer’s command, the prick would be used to jab the ox. Sometimes the ox would refuse this incentive by kicking out at the prick. As result, the prick would be driven deeper into the flesh of the rebellious animal. The more the animal rebelled, the more the animal suffered. Therefore, Jesus’ statement to Saul as he fought against His church was that “it is hard for thee to kick against the pricks.” (Acts 9:5).

God has all power, but he gives us the freedom to kick as we wish. However, much like the ox, we are not free from the consequences of such kicking. However, as God’s children, we may elect to disobey Him, but when we disobey, we pay. “[T]he way of transgressors is hard.” (Prov. 13: 15). When we continue to disobey and rebel, we are like the ox – driving the prick in deeper and deeper, hurting ourselves in rebelling against authority.

“[B]ut when we undertake to cover our sins, or to gratify our pride, our vain ambition, . . . behold, the heavens withdraw themselves; the Spirit of the Lord is grieved; and when it is withdrawn, Amen to the priesthood or the authority of that man. Behold, ere he is aware, he is left unto himself, to kick against the pricks, to persecute the saints, and to fight against God.” (D&C 121:37-38).

Don't Lose Yourself

On Monday morning, following the holiday weekend, I was getting ready to go to work. Angelina, who had apparently gotten used to having me around the home for the previous three days, looked concerned by my putting on the shirt and tie. She came over to me and said, "Daddy, you going to work?" After I replied in the affirmative, she became very serious and said, "Daddy, don't lose yourself."

Good advice, not only for that day, but for life.

Independence Day Tradition

For my entire life, it has been a tradition in our family to spend the Fourth of July at my grandfather's cabin at Mt. Charleston. This rustic cabin, which was built in 1941, has been owned by my grandfather since the early 1950's. Although it is certainly nothing special to look at, it holds a deeply treasured place in the hearts and minds of my family. In society, and in our families, traditions help establish our sense of identity and fill the vital human need to belong.

For decades, the cabin has helped fill the need to belong by serving as the family's gathering place for the summer holidays; Memorial Day, Independence Day and Labor Day always start with a potluck lunch and is followed by a hike to Little Falls.

In between, there are always lots of games, piecing on food, sharing of stories and playing at the Mt. Charleston school.

The Scottish philosopher and essayist Thomas Carlyle wrote, “What an enormous magnifier is tradition! How a thing grows in the human memory and in the human imagination, when love, worship, and all that lies in the human heart, is there to encourage it.” The love that exists within our family has clearly been magnified by the traditional gatherings, where ties are created and friendships are renewed.

Every new generation in our family has been introduced to and made a part of this tradition.

From the time that I was young, going to the cabin meant adventure. Since my earliest memory, children have built forts and clubhouses with tree branches and scrap wood from the area nearby. Sticks served as swords, guns, lightsabers and wands.

Rocks have been used for projectiles, home base, and on occasion, a geology lesson from Grandpa Joe.

In a tradition that does not have to be taught, typical childhood games of army, cops and robbers, cowboys and indians, and now, Star Wars, Pirates of the Caribbean and Harry Potter are played out with each generation.

Woohoo - The Ballard Family Photos Are In

The long-awaited and anticipated Ballard family photos have been posted in a slide show on the Heather Gibb Photography website. Click here and enter "ballard" as the password to see our show. Help us to decide which photos to select.

Cutie Pie

Angelina looked so cute in her pajamas, sitting by the wall, that I just had to snap this shot. She makes it hard to take a bad photo.

Blogged Down

I just haven't felt like posting lately. I have kept writing some, but I just needed a break from the blog. Without getting into the boring details, I have been working on a number of technology issues lately. I am still not quite done, but we have made some major improvements, with still more to come. We just acquired a scanner that I believe will allow me to add many of the old photos. I am so looking forward to that (not the work, but the end result).

Technology issues explain part of the reason, but not the whole story. Lately, I just have not felt like blogging. We have been pretty busy, and I know that I need to keep recording what we do: the triumphs, the tragedies, the highs and the lows. However, the heart has to be in it, which it has not of late. The good news is that I feel like I might have found my mojo again, and I'll be working over this coming weekend to make up some lost ground.